When I Almost Lost It


The worst thing that happened to me yesterday was that I forgot to set my fantasy football teams up to win and there was a game last night. Go Pittsburgh!!!! I was sick with disgust. I thought about where I was this time a year ago. I was trying to figure out how I could rob Peter to pay Paul without Mary finding out. That was a crazy time, not scary. IF everyone around me would have known what my scared prayers were asking God what would they have thought? Wow, what a difference faith makes. My worries are different when I allow God to handle the problem while I wait on the solution using the favor available and the obedience time provides. I didn’t have a money or crazy problem, I had a patience crisis. Life was moving along at a consistent pace. I couldn't mitigate outcomes I was too busy waiting to see if it would get better doing nothing. I had a good heart but the wrong spirit. I was trying to manipulate outcomes versus being mindful and obedient with the time God provided. I use to love people with things and I ran out of things to buy and the people never wanted or needed the stuff. The value I placed on my worth to their time was put into stuff that didn't matter. The stuff does not have the heart to care. It will only work until the batteries die. I was not transparent or vulnerable enough to use my words or prayer to seek help. I consciously tried to find new ways to do things for people that I couldn't. It wasn't about disappointing their expectations, I had none of myself. Giving them stuff meant more than being available to pray or share priceless time with them. It makes a difference how you evaluated the worst things that happened in a day, especially when you made it through. Fantasy football is a joke compared to the problems I have given to God. I still don't want to lose the fantasy game, but what will it really matter in the grand scheme of things. I'm winning and losing is not an option. My growth and maturity changed my mentality. I can't wait for crisis to burden me mentally, because the people I serve deserve for me to be as present as they are available. Time is the most precious thing you can give and can't get back, God gives it to spend with you. Amen


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